What is your best piece of advice for parenting adult children?

Hello, my name is Ron Blue. Judy and I have reached a point in life where we have five adult children that are all married, and we have eleven grandchildren. One of the questions I get frequently is, “Are there any tricks to raising adult children, or dealing with adult children?” You know, no one prepares you for the task of parenting at really any point in life, but especially for the parenting of adult children. How do you interact with your adult children?

I believe that there are just two pieces of advice I would give to people. First of all, you need to be praying for each member of your family on a regular, ongoing basis. As you know what their needs are, bring them before the Lord in prayer. I think that is one of the tremendous roles of a parent and grandparent, especially as their children get older, because they face so many complex and difficult decisions. So I would say, number one, pray.

Number two, from the standpoint of what you say to them, I guess the one piece of advice that I would give is to never give unasked-for advice. It is so tempting to say, “We did it this way,” or “Why don’t you do it that way?” or “I don’t agree with how you are doing that.” But, you have to realize that these are adult children and they are doing the best that they can in parenting and in their own relationship. I think one of the worst things that we can do as a parent at that point is to offer unasked-for advice. That may take a lot of prayer also.

Click here for the July 3, 2009 Blog Entry